Thursday, May 19, 2005

A random column in our local newspaper today really ticked me off. I read it online and the tease said something about a "tough" mother's day. I probably should have ignored it, but I guess it's true that misery loves company. I clicked to the full article expecting a story I could relate to and a woman who might be a local kindred spirit. Instead it was this ridiculous column about how mother's day is "tough" because if her family doesn't shower her with gifts and attention she feels neglected, but if they do she feels guilty about all the times she hasn't been "supermom."

(that's probably a generational reference; apologies to anyone who hasn't seen "The Breakfast Club" 142 times.)

But really, this is what constitutes a difficult mother's day? Please! I was telling John about it, trying to describe how it made me feel to read that, and it's difficult because I don't want to be the kind of person who thinks no one else's problems amount to a hill of beans because they haven't had to tell a doctor they understand there is nothing left to help their son and then ask to hold him while his heart stops beating. I guess it's all in your perspective. I hope this woman never experiences any more difficulty than that on mother's day. I would not wish this pain on my worst enemy, even the evil girl who tormented me all through junior high. But I think before complaining publicly about how "tough" things are, people might do well to think of how much tougher they could be and thank God or their lucky stars or whatever for what they have.

It's not easy. We all struggle with it. I had a good reminder tonight of the love surrounding us when I was looking for an email address and ended up scanning through the hundreds of messages in my "Will" email folder. I don't go there often--it's enough to know that the messages are all there. But every now and then, I re-read a few to recall the love and support that surrounded us while Will lived and when he died. I'm not so insanely at peace with myself that I actually feel lucky to have had this experience, but we are blessed to have such love in our lives and to know it. That's what enables us to endure the tough days.


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